A Letter to Sarah

I have never been the right person to come to, or even the right person to handle pain. Especially loss of someones life. There was just something off about this particular morning. The 23rd of May 2017. For one reason or another I could not sleep well and I remember asking God to let his will be done and i went back to sleep.

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The first time I met you was a Sunday. right after church. you came to visit together with your husband and children. you are one of the people who asked more than the usual “how are you” questions. you asked how my Sunday was, what course I was studying in university and if I actually liked it. Something that no one has ever asked. At least on the first day of meeting.  your children are the most beautiful beings ever! I am sorry I never got to tell you that but I guess its now too late.

I still remember the silent prayer I made, asking God to give me a family like yours. a supportive husband like yours. I am sorry I never got to tell you that I admired your family, but I guess its now too late.

We did a surprise house make over for your house. and it was just amazing to see how many people supported that project and just came to support you. I know having cancer is not an easy thing.  see, we gave you the coastal feel you have always wanted and the look on your face melted my heart.

ITAK-MBASOUT-1The way you hugged your husband and thanked him for the beautiful surprise, the way you asked your kids if they liked the house, I still play that in my mind. I am sorry I could not tell you that I liked it too, but I guess its too late now.

My sister asked me what my best project was and without blinking I said yours was. because I knew this came from my heart. After talking to your house manager, I learned so much about you (forgive my curious mind Sarah). I learned that you are giving, and loving and above all, positive. I remember asking God to give me such a heart too. you knew that one day you would beat cancer, and see your kids grow up and so was it a prayer. I am sorry I did not tell you that I prayed for you daily, but guess it is too late.

Sarah, you were an amazing woman. I learned faith from you and how to love God in all situations. to give from a heart of love. and to give without expecting anything in return.

My heart goes out to your family. Your little children. I know you will be watching them from above. I also know that heaven has truly gained an angel. please say hi to my dad while there, tell him I will write to him too, very soon.

Beach-at-Southern-Palms-Hotel

I still can not believe you are gone!

Rest with the angels Sarah..

Published by Savailomosiblog

I hope my blog makes you choose yourself over and over again. I hope it makes you proud of the mistakes you have made and the ones you are about to make. I hope you learn also that the world is only as small as you make it. I hope you look in the mirror and say (in the words of Gabrielle Union) “I choose my motherfucking self”. By reading my blog you will either laugh or cry. I would love for you to do the first one. I am well aware that life is not a joke but mine might just happen to be. To me, all wins are lessons and all my failures are lessons that will one day become wins. I love all shades of gold, I guess you can call me that name that has popped into your head right about now. I am good at a lot of mediocre things. I am good at writing my thoughts down which means that if I get an idea at 3A.M I will wake up and write it down. I can also wake up to read. I enjoy reading. Also because I forget things quite easily. Like people’s names. Or birthdays. Or anniversaries. I am also good at trying new things. Like face masks or going to the gym. I do have a habit of repeating things I love and going to places I love over and over again. Which explains why when I go to places I order the same food over and over. It’s interesting because I had never noticed this about myself till when my nephew pointed it out to me. I generally walk fast even when I am going nowhere. This has its downside because it find it quite hard to walk with my mum. I feel like I am rushing her and it makes me look impatient. This means that at least I come out of high school with one lesson: The world loves quick women. Speed gives me adrenaline rush, which is odd because I have fear of heights. And enclosed spaces. And crowds. And underground parking lots. And flying animals. Well, this information will not make your life any better. Nor will it make you enter the kingdom of heaven. You won’t use it in an interview. Or a date, but at least you know my fears and what makes me happy, which is speed. And going to supermarkets, and taking drives with my sister. I go by these universal truths: your eyeliner will never match. So will your eyebrows, and there’s no way on earth you know your exact bra size. Tell you what, if someone asks for my bra size, we will stare at each other until one of us dies. But I do believe it’s a D. D is a pretty letter. A D size cup seems to be sexy and so I declare myself a D size! Again, the above information has nothing to do with my about so go ahead and take a break. Eat an apple or something. But my take home is this: if you really want to know your bra size, simply wear every single bra in the whole universe, for the rest of your life. Why am I making this bio about bras? I promise I don’t always bring up bras in my conversations. Lastly, other truths are: Panadol will solve your problems the next morning, potatoes are underrated, you do not have to wash your bra that often and there is no better feeling in the world than getting home and removing your bra. I am not photogenic but be sure to tell me when you are taking a photo so I pose and make it look unawares. I am not good at closing blinds or handling metal or glass stuff. I want you to read my blog and feel like we could be friends. If not now then maybe in the next life. I believe in reincarnation. You should drink while reading this. Or when I say a joke you like. Or when I say something that you relate to. Or just when you want to. We are friends right? And friends do not judge. I cannot end this without telling you my fears. My biggest fear is that I become so content with being single that I start convincing myself that I do not need a man. All in all, I am here to tell you stories you have no business listening to but you still do. You should totally read them! P.S Life is short and so am I. P.S.S I can be fat and still waaaay out of your league.

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24 thoughts on “A Letter to Sarah”

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  12. That’s my kid sis,well done and keep going.As for Sarah,the angels are rejoicing for she has joined them.Gone too soon.

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